THE PICTURE PAGES
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nice day.
A special addition to the pages, plus the usual fair - my site, the RANT, and,
where the results of the occassional kook patrol are immortalized, THE LINKS
PAGE...
Here we love good Macintosh talk, we adore Adobe, and we WORSHIP DAVE...
Send links, pictures and hate mail to: duh@mac.com
And remember, "If you can't say anything nice about someone, come over and
sit by me..." Never more true is this saying, than here in the lair of the EVIL
CLOWN. Muuhhhaaahhaaahhhaa....
Rocket Man 57 - 03:20am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#1 of 614)
DUH's House of Fairy Dust And Massage
LOL
SV_Doug - 03:33am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#2 of 614)
Duh check your email...
Duh_ - 03:37am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#3 of 614)
My pig...
Duh_ - 03:40am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#4 of 614)
And thank you to all you who helped me and worried about me. I couldn't have picked a better family than you
all. You helped me and took me serious when all I was doing was freaking over a guinea pig.
MsRobbie - 03:41am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#5 of 614)
Mousey was a cutie.
Duh_ - 03:42am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#6 of 614)
Mousey was a fattie.
MsRobbie - 03:43am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#7 of 614)
Duh: I couldn't have picked a better family than you all.
Oh, sure you could have. However, we're the family that's here. And we love you.
Duh_ - 03:44am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#8 of 614)
Underside of ex-mousey...
MsRobbie - 03:45am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#9 of 614)
Yep, Mousey was a fattie!
Rocket Man 57 - 03:47am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#10 of 614)
Either that or has real big breasts.
Duh_ - 03:56am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#11 of 614)
Leftover mousey...
Duh_ - 03:58am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#12 of 614)
Actually Brown Mousey is, I guess, now, Mousey. He's kind of freaking and running around. And, I swear to
god, his little eyes look like they are tearing up.
He's coming over to me now, never use to do that...
Duh_ - 04:21am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#13 of 614)
Oh, shoot. Wrong number, it should be thread number seven.... crap...
edrieanne - 04:24am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#14 of 614)
Duh, just wanted you to know that Mousey was a REALLY big hit at the Orchid Room.
He brought a great many smiles to many faces!
But, never as many smiles as your own.
I'm sorry. Give little mousey a hug for me and my crew, would ya?
Duh_ - 04:25am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#15 of 614)
Crew sends love to you, too.
Duh_ - 04:26am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#16 of 614)
........golly, this is all gone so sappy.....
((((((((sniffle))))))))))
*******grin*********
edrieanne - 04:41am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#17 of 614)
oh, crew said that they send YOU a hug, too - along with muddy feets prints, half chewed rawhides (goochie
swears it'll help), a goody bag of kibble and tutu's favorite ball - it lights up when it bounces.
goochie wanted to send you HIS favorite chew toys, but I needed them to use as a pattern to make NEW RV
seat cushions.
Toad sends his best barks.
MsRobbie - 04:54am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#18 of 614)
Dusty, have you let Brown Mousey see and snif Mousey? I've heard critters accept and understand better if
they're allowed to do that.
He also might be very lonesome with Mousey gone. You might consider getting a New Mousey pretty soon.
Duh_ - 05:08am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#19 of 614)
Well, Brown Mousey sniffed and prodded sick Mousey. But when sick Mousey became dead Mousey, he kind of
didn't do anything. And I can't get dead mousey for Brown Mousey to sniff because whahizface put him in
the freezer.
BM is pretty much freaking, so I don't know...
They were littermates... And got along pretty well except for BM trying to hump M, but I got him to stop
that...
Duh_ - 05:13am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#20 of 614)
As for more rodents. Well, I am going to have to think about that. Critters have such short life spans - just
long enough for me to get attached...
I'm going to bed, its been a tough past 4 hours...
_maggie_ - 05:14am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#21 of 614)
Maybe put a little stuffed toy or a sock stuffed with something nice and soft for him to cuddle with tonight.
Rocket Man 57 - 05:14am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#22 of 614)
Doctor Frankenfurter ("Doc"), my pet doxie, is ten years old today. Love him dearly. Hope he lives another
comfortable, happy ten years, but know that isn't at all realistic. So, I'm buying him a nice little steak.
edrieanne - 05:25am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#23 of 614)
friend of mine's father told her, when she was little and her dog died, that because there are so many of
them and so few of us, God only gives each one a little time so that there are enough of us to go around.
Relish the joy, savor the happiness, for the moment of sadness, would you really trade all that came before?
love is a funny thing, it isn't how long it lasts, it is the "realness" of it's being that matters.
nite, duh, mousey sounded like a really wonderful critter - he was lucky to have you and brown mousey to
make his life filled with good things.
Rocketman, kisses to Doc Frankenfurter (with the awesome name!) from me and my crew. [but buy chicken,
instead - easier on the older kidneys, my vet said!]
nite all.
CooterBrown - 06:53am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#24 of 614)
Well, I thought that maybe all of us could show our animals the pics, and they could be sorry for their
owner's.........strike that......feeder's friends.
Soooooooo.....I get Buddy and Miss Rose up here. They just licked their chops.
Go figure.
Riona - 10:25am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#25 of 614)
Duhoney.... Mousey was cute... Brown Mousie should settle down ... I don't know if I'd give him something he
could chew up and choke on tho.
Do you have any carrots? When Cali has to do something she doesn't want (vet, bath, whatever) to I always
give her a carrot after and she calms right down....
Chicklita said to tell you she was very sorry about your piggie.
RM... My aunt had chihuhuas that lived to be 20 years or more... All she ever fed the things was brown rice
and boiled chicken... without the gizzard... that has stones and causes kidney trouble... processed canned
chicken flavored dog food can cause problems....
Good luck with your weiner dog.*S*
CooterBrown - 10:58am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#26 of 614)
Dusty, I ordered a new puter for my office yesterday. Eat your heart out. *G*
Riona - 11:09am Jan 24, 2001 EST (#27 of 614)
Is it a G4, Cooter? If not she might not be hungry..*S*
Duh_ - 12:52pm Jan 24, 2001 EST (#28 of 614)
Unless it was a mondo cool G4, I can nod and smile like I'm eating my heart out. Does that help?
*****nodding wildly****
Oregon_Jim - 12:55pm Jan 24, 2001 EST (#29 of 614)
Dusty, I ordered a new puter for my office yesterday
Michael Dell was so happy about that order too!
LMAO
Duh_ - 11:25pm Jan 24, 2001 EST (#30 of 614)
((((side note))))
Here’s hoping:
A) Guinea Pigs Go To Heaven
B) Whahizface remembers to take him out of the freezer on trash day... not like the house mouse that stayed
in there for two months...
surferchicklet - 11:43pm Jan 24, 2001 EST (#31 of 614)
Guinea Pigs do go to heaven... and why not bury him in the back yard?
You feeling better Duhoney?
surferchicklet - 11:44pm Jan 24, 2001 EST (#32 of 614)
oh... duh-me... doggies... sorry...
Duh_ - 11:47pm Jan 24, 2001 EST (#33 of 614)
... and you aren't it. [surferchicklet] - 11:43pm Jan 24, 2001 EST (#31 of 32)
Guinea Pigs do go to heaven... and why not bury him in the back yard?
You feeling better Duhoney?
I’m feeling better. I‘m think about ((((shutter))) getting another one for little Brown Mousey, cause
they are s’pose to be social animals, and BM has never been without one of his own kind CONSTANTLY
with him. Po’ little bastard probably going out of his mind...
edrieanne - 11:51pm Jan 24, 2001 EST (#34 of 614)
either get little mousey another friend or you or hubby are going to have to grow a LOT of hair! *g*
backyard - post hole digger, deep, works. That's how I buried Squiggy. Oh, if you pick a rose bush or
flowering plant, the flowers will bring a smile each time they bloom.
Sam Shepherd, Sam Shepherd is beneath his favorite rose bush.
surferchicklet - 11:51pm Jan 24, 2001 EST (#35 of 614)
Give him lots of attention?
Ours is an only pig. Mostly because I haven't trusted myself to pick a tiny baby girl, not a boy... and if
the female is over 6 to 9 months old an has never had babies her hips fuse... then she can die... or have
to have a C -section...
So... She doesn't seem to mind much... I taught her to sit up and beg the other day..*S* and she comes
out to play now..
Duh_ - 01:09am Jan 25, 2001 EST (#36 of 614)
Edrie, a little correction....
hubby
subsistute: whahizface
edrieanne - 01:10am Jan 25, 2001 EST (#37 of 614)
8^) oh, ok
8^)
Blackricco - 01:16am Jan 25, 2001 EST (#38 of 614)
I'm sorry for your loss, Dusty, watching a pet suffer sucks.
Again, my condolences
Duh_ - 01:34am Jan 25, 2001 EST (#40 of 614)
Thank you Ricco.
Thank you everybody.
BARRY F SULLIVAN - 09:53am Jan 25, 2001 EST (#42 of 614)
GM. What about the ones you have eaten, or run over. Could be nasty!
CooterBrown - 10:05am Jan 25, 2001 EST (#43 of 614)
Uh, Riona....it's not a Mac...it's a PC.
Dell my ass! I've got 12 Dells here now, and those are the worst pieces of fecal matter I've ever been
around.
I'm having this one built by a local company that I'm familiar with that has an execellent reputation.
Three year on site warranty for parts and labor. *G*
guy montag - 10:20am Jan 25, 2001 EST (#44 of 614)
Barry
GM. What about the ones you have eaten, or run over. Could be nasty!
Obviously, if you've run over or eaten a critter, you didn't love it like a pet...
wardaddy - 10:37am Jan 25, 2001 EST (#45 of 614)
Sorry to hear about your pet dying, Dusty. I know from recent experience how tough it is to lose one.
Still choke up a little when I think of little Kai.
freeindividual - 11:52am Jan 25, 2001 EST (#46 of 614)
Thought of the Day:
The three most powerful people in the USA now are named, Bush, Dick, and Colon. Quite a Threesome
don't you think?
guy montag - 09:37pm Jan 25, 2001 EST (#47 of 614)
From surferchicklet
(who, through no fault of her own, is currently unable to post but wanted to get this up for general
consumption...)
http://www.dustygroove.com/funky45list.htm
On Dusty's thread is all I wanted to post... you can do it. I thought the addy/link title was apt..
DaveGin - 09:54pm Jan 25, 2001 EST (#48 of 614)
May he always have new papers in the cage and fresh water, Duh. My condolences.
CooterBrown - 10:51pm Jan 25, 2001 EST (#49 of 614)
Free, I really needed to be aware of that. LOL!
Duh_ - 12:12am Jan 26, 2001 EST (#50 of 614)
They're selling postcards of the hanging... [DaveGin] - 09:54pm Jan 25, 2001 EST (#48 of
49)
May he always have new papers in the cage and fresh water, Duh. My condolences.
Thank you. All your wishes are very much appreciated. I'm just sorry the whole thing played out on
the board...
Got the webcam back up... even got it pointed at me...
edrieanne - 12:47am Jan 26, 2001 EST (#51 of 614)
good to "see" ya again! Duh
Please don't apologise for allowing us to share a moment of your life. Thank YOU for allowing us to be
there!
freeindividual - 12:51am Jan 26, 2001 EST (#52 of 614)
Serious warning!
Men, be more alert and cautious when getting a drink offer from a girl.
Good girls out there, please forward this message to your guy friends. And girlfriends, take heed.
There is a new drug that is in liquid form.
The drug is now being used by female sexual predators at parties to induce their male victims to have
sex with them. The shocking news is that the drug is available virtually anywhere!
It goes by the street name "Beer."
All girls have to do is buy a "Beer" or two for almost any guy and then simply ask the guy home for
no-strings-attached sex.
Men are rendered literally helpless against such tactics.
MsRobbie - 01:02am Jan 26, 2001 EST (#53 of 614)
Freeindividual: The three most powerful people in the USA now are named, Bush, Dick, and Colon.
It's alimentary, my dear Watson.
SherrieG - 01:07am Jan 26, 2001 EST (#54 of 614)
Took a lot of guts to say that.
Duh_ - 04:31am Jan 26, 2001 EST (#55 of 614)
You guys are probably just sick of hearing about the piggie, but I just saw the saddest thing. Little
BrownMousey is running around the house, and he never does that. He went into the little bathroom
I use for the animals, for the first time in his life and ventured sniffing toward the bathtub - the
same bathtub in which the other Mousey died. I haven't taken the towels out that held the other pig,
so, I guess his scent is still on it. Can guinea pigs mourn? I wonder if he is.
I know most think its an anthropomorphic sin to attribute imagined human-like traits to animals.
I've always believed that animals possess rudimentary emotions and basic feelings common to all
life. But can guinea pigs mourn? Elephants have been known to scatter the bones of their dead in a
"ritualistic" kind of action. I feel so sorry for him. I wonder if he is sad or confused?
I promise.... last sad pig post.
Duh_ - 04:32am Jan 26, 2001 EST (#56 of 614)
Tomorrow, I'll get some Tuaca, and we'll have a kook patrol.
edrieanne - 04:48am Jan 26, 2001 EST (#57 of 614)
Duh, my dogs have always "mourned" the loss of one of our family. Some actually take "shifts" and
comfort the others. One would become listless, sit where the missing one would normally stay and
just look sad. (ears down, eyes down.... etc.) One of the others would come over and sit by the "sad"
one and gently place a head nearby or nuzzle the "down" doggie. When I was sad, they'd do the same
for me.
Why we assume that animals don't mourn is beyond me. Birds, such as mourning doves mate for life -
and when one is killed, it is not uncommon to see the mate sitting by the one who died. I frequently
have stopped to move a dove who has been killed out of the road because the mate just sits in the
middle of the traffic and won't leave it's mate.
The short answer is, yes, brown mousey is mourning.
Comfort him, hold him and he WILL feel better.
You, too.
off line for about an hour - back then.
The mighty Red - 08:30am Jan 26, 2001 EST (#58 of 614)
Are you charging for massages in here? Cuz, damn is my shoulder sore...
sjscruby - 08:58am Jan 26, 2001 EST (#59 of 614)
duh...sorry I missed the sad time, but reading about it all DID bring serious tears. I have 3 kitties, and
cannot imagine what it will be like when I lose one. *sigh*
Duh_ - 07:33pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#60 of 614)
Float like a butterfly... Sting like a bee [The mighty Red] - 08:30am Jan 26, 2001 EST
(#58 of 59)
Are you charging for massages in here? Cuz, damn is my shoulder sore...
Are you sure? We contract out to Hank to do them....
Duh_ - 07:36pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#61 of 614)
Susan [sjscruby] - 08:58am Jan 26, 2001 EST (#59 of 60)
duh...sorry I missed the sad time, but reading about it all DID bring serious tears. I
have 3 kitties, and cannot imagine what it will be like when I lose one. *sigh*
As I told GUY a little bit ago, I’m kind of thinking of getting BM a little friend, but having two
mousies creates a lot of poop.... but he seems a little disturbed. Plus if I get him a friend that is
smaller than him, we may have that humping problem again (he likes to hump others) although I
have trained him not to - when he starts in, I can go "Mousey, no humping!! No humping!!" and he
stops and backs into a corner and rubs his butt on the side of the cage...
Duh_ - 07:44pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#62 of 614)
Funny (I think) Mousey Story:
Got the rodents a bit ago, and specified males because females get *that time of the month* and it just
gets all messy and gross. I get them home, and I got them a tall two story cage, and all the mousey
ammenities of pampered little rodents. Well, after a while, there appeared little white dried stains in
the cage. I was panicking because, god, is there something wrong with the mousies? Are they
puking? What’s going on?
I got my answer a couple days later when the Brown Mousey looked a little funny. He was sitting
there haunched back on his hind legs, and having spasms. ((((Lord, I started to dial the vet)))) I
looked closer and his goo-goo was sticking straight out spewing mousey ooze. AAAUUUGGGHHHH!!!
And you know, that thing was about a half inch long. After, I guess, it was empty, it deflated and
looked like one of those earthworms that dries up on the sidewalk on a summer day. When he started
yanking on it with his teeth is when I left the room....
I don’t have very good coping skills when it comes to fluids coming out of my animals....
surferchicklet - 07:47pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#63 of 614)
Is Whaizname trained as well, Duh?
I'll do Red's massage... Hank might scare him, and I have gotten kind of fond of him....LOL
Uh, Why's your shoulder sore, Red?
I think waiting for another piggie might be a good idea... then get another cage, set the two near
eachother and see what happens.. they can get used to each other that way... just put them in the
same area while you're there... until you know they get along ok.
surferchicklet - 07:50pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#64 of 614)
LOL>..
But, Dusty... we have a female and she doesn't get messy that way... I have never even noticed when
she was in heat.
The mighty Red - 07:57pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#65 of 614)
At least you don't have a killer gerbil like we did in fifth grade. One of the gerbils murdered the
other one over the weekend and ate out all his guts. Our class got first look at the carnage when we
showed up for school on Monday morning and the teacher was late. Quite traumatizing.
and Duh... That story was most definintely NOT funny, ick!
SC, thanks for the offer. Hank does scare me, and I have some worries ever since Cooter was hitting
on me back in the Rumpus Room a couple months ago...</kidding>
Got the sore shoulder when I got doored on my bicycle a decade ago. I went sailing over a couple of
cars and landed on my shoulder on the hood of a moving vehicle. I still vividly remember the look of
the people in the car as I came sailing over their heads. I was too pissed at the woman that doored me
to see about insurance or anything. I scared her off with my yelling. No medical insurance at the
time. So now, sore shoulder. Oh well...
Duh_ - 08:00pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#66 of 614)
... and you aren't it. [surferchicklet] - 07:47pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#63 of 65)
Is Whaizname trained as well, Duh?
I’ll refrain from answering, since pooky has started dropping by to read... (I call him pooky, isn’t
that just sweet? Same name I use on the dogs, tho.)
When I had hamsters (before the dog had hamsters) they went into *messy times* and there was
blood all over the cage. That time I did call the vet, who promptly laughed at me and said that it was
their periods. AWWW GAWWWD, was the mess awful, and they ate the stuff they messied on.
When I got these guys, and the humping started, I looked into what it would cost to get them fixed.
$120 per rat... geeze.
At least you don't have a killer gerbil like we did in fifth grade. One of the gerbils
murdered the other one over the weekend and ate out all his guts. Our class got first
look at the carnage when we showed up for school on Monday morning and the
teacher was late. Quite traumatizing.
Before I knew better, I had two large rats (actual black and white rats) and two gerbils. Kept them in
the same cage. Came home one time, and noticed that one of the gerbil‘s leg was all bloody and gross.
Didn’t know what that was. Then later, I found out (description of carnage snipped) that the rats
were eating the gerbils. Well, I set them free in the back yard, and the neighbor (and old blue hair)
nearly had a cornary when she saw one crawling up her tree... I should ask - do guinea pigs eat
hamsters? I thought I would get BM a little hamster for company.
Duh_ - 08:00pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#67 of 614)
Whahizface is a patient, patient, patient, dude, considering my adventures with pets....
The mighty Red - 08:05pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#68 of 614)
I think I'm leaving until the gross pet stories are over...
I'm trying to eat here...
Bleah.
Duh_ - 08:09pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#69 of 614)
Gross pet stories make the world go ‘round....
surferchicklet - 09:04pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#70 of 614)
LOL...gross pet stories...
Awwww... Poor Red...
{{rub rub rub rub}}
Better?
Duh... rats?? ick.... Mouse , hamster, g pig, yes... gerbils and rats? ick.
I don't think I'd get a hamster... In stead of a cage tho I have one of the biggest tubs they make for
storage. the clear plastic thing? I pop the piggie in her kennel carrier or something, roll up the
newspaper, wash the tub out, dry it out and all done...
uuuh... no, that won't work for you... the roomies big dog was half in the tub trying to eat our piggie
once...
surferchicklet - 09:06pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#71 of 614)
Oh, BTW, considering how much you love the dogs, I think Whahizname should be flattered by being
called *Pookie*...
The mighty Red - 09:12pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#72 of 614)
Ahhhhh.... Much better thanks!
I always wanted one of those plastic gerbil cities when I was a kid. You know, the ones with all the
clear tunnels and toys that the gerbils can play with. I still think they're kind of cool, but I think
my cat might find the gerbils more interesting, if you know what I mean.
SherrieG - 09:15pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#73 of 614)
We have these round clear balls for the hamsters and they roll all over the floor when we're
cleaning cages. Drives Purrsian NUTS.
We put Precious in with Blackie the other night and all kinds of interesting things went on...Aaron
says where are the babies? I said that takes a few weeks. He said a few WEEKS? Why were they going
so fast at the end then?
I said "Ask Dave."
Duh_ - 09:17pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#74 of 614)
... and you aren't it. [surferchicklet] - 09:04pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#70 of 72)
I don't think I'd get a hamster... In stead of a cage tho I have one of the biggest tubs
they make for storage. the clear plastic thing? I pop the piggie in her kennel
carrier or something, roll up the newspaper, wash the tub out, dry it out and all
done...
uuuh... no, that won't work for you... the roomies big dog was half in the tub trying
to eat our piggie once...
I half thought about getting a kiddie pool and using that to keep the piggies in. But I’d have to scoop
it out. Although I could line it with newspaper. But then there are the rodent killing pooches... they
just love the feel of the crunch.... ***sigh***
1000 points of light and we got the dumb one... [SherrieG] - 09:15pm Jan 26, 2001 EST
(#73 of 74)
We have these round clear balls for the hamsters and they roll all over the floor
when we're cleaning cages. Drives Purrsian NUTS.
EEEEPPPS. They pee and poo in those things. AAAUUUGGG. I had an enclosed wheely thing for the
ex-hamsters. It got purdy gross.
Duh_ - 09:24pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#76 of 614)
Why were they going so fast at the end then?
Fast at what end???? huh? Fast having babies?
SherrieG - 09:32pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#77 of 614)
fast MAKING babies, Dusty.
Duh_ - 09:34pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#78 of 614)
((((((:0o))))))))
surferchicklet - 09:39pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#79 of 614)
LOL...
A kiddie pool might work, if you didn't have dogs...
I am going to switch her to a tub thing I saw at Home Depot... it is a big square black tub... Actually,
that might work for you... make a wooden frame that fits over the top, brace it diagonally with
another strip, and staple gun wire mesh to it... make sure it fits over the lip of the tub and put
something on it to keep pooches out....
We have a G Pig ball for Cali but she just sits there and glares at me.
We also did have the tube things Red... For a hamster tho... and she got so big she could brace herself
against one end of a tube or the wheel and push and pop the thing right open.*S*
Chicklita wants a mouse sized one with pipe running all over her room for the mouse...
Duh_ - 09:49pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#80 of 614)
Chicklita, it sounds nice, but when they start peeing and pooing in that large, long pipe going
through your room, your gonna wanna wretch...
surferchicklet - 09:59pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#81 of 614)
Which is why she doesn't have it...The hamster moved into an aquarium after about a year..
I told her the little guy's name might be Stewert, but unlike the movie Stewert this one has bodily
functions... She said he also has *luggage*...LOL
Duh_ - 10:06pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#82 of 614)
Did you see the luggage on my ex-one? I scanned him and his noogies appeared ENORMOUS....
surferchicklet - 10:12pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#83 of 614)
I did, she did too... and said "Thank God Cali's a girl... "
Hamsters are worse tho.. when we got Ralph (A female, btw) there were boys in there and we didn't
want one of them...
surferchicklet - 10:16pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#84 of 614)
I just realized.... I don't think I told you that Chicklita said to tell you she was really sorry...
She says she wants to get another girl piggie who is pregnant... she said now that we can keep the
girls and bring you the boys...
Cali can't have babies... she's too old for a first litter now.....
Duh_ - 10:22pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#85 of 614)
... and you aren't it. [surferchicklet] - 10:16pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#84 of 84)
now that we can keep the girls and bring you the boys...
Kewl. Just stickem in a FedEx envelope and send them here...
surferchicklet - 10:40pm Jan 26, 2001 EST (#86 of 614)
We'll wait til about two months before school is out ... by the time they're ready to go we could bring
them...
I have a horror of getting the tiny babies mixed up tho... and having guinea pigs take over the
house like the tribbles took over the Enterprise...
Duh_ - 12:46am Jan 27, 2001 EST (#87 of 614)
Catching the tail end of MOONSTRUCK. I wish Cher would read this thread, because I would like to tell
her she shouldn't have had all that shit injected into her lips. She looks MUCH better with normal
lips instead of those butt ugly innertubes she's got now...
SherrieG - 01:22am Jan 27, 2001 EST (#88 of 614)
IN HONOR OF CHAROLAIS!!!
World Government Systems explained in terms of cows.
FEUDALISM
You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.
SOCIALISM
You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows.
You have to take care of all the cows. The government gives you a glass of milk.
FASCISM
You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them, and sells you the
milk.
PURE COMMUNISM
You share two cows with your neighbors. You and your neighbors bicker about who has the most
"ability" and who has the most "need." Meanwhile, no one works, no one gets any milk, and the cows
drop dead of starvation.
RUSSIAN COMMUNISM
You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk. You steal
back as much milk as you can and sell it on the black market.
PERESTROIKA
You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the Mafia takes all the milk. You steal back as
much milk as you can and sell it on the "free market."
CAMBODIAN COMMUNISM
You have two cows. The government takes both and shoots you.
DICTATORSHIP
You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you.
PURE DEMOCRACY
You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk.
REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY
You have two cows. Your neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.
BUREAUCRACY
You have two cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can
milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and
pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing
cows.
CAPITALISM
You don't have any cows. The bank will not lend you money to buy cows because you don't have any
cows to put up as collateral.
PURE ANARCHY
You have two cows. Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors try to take the cows and
kill you.
ANARCHO-CAPITALISM
You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.
SURREALISM
You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.
OLYMPICS-ISM
You have two cows, one American, one Chinese. With the help of trilling violins and state of the art
montage photography, John Tesh narrates the moving tale of how the American cow overcame the
agony of growing up in a suburb with (gasp) divorced parents, then mentions in passing that the
Chinese cow was beaten every day by a tyrannical farmer and watched its parents butchered before
its eyes. The American cow wins the competition, severely spraining an udder in a gritty
performance, and gets a multi-million dollar contract to endorse Wheaties. The Chinese cow is led out
of the arena and shot by Chinese government officials, though no one ever hears about it.
McDonald's buys the meat and serves it hot and fast at its Beijing restaurant.
AMERICAN CORPORATE CAPITALISM
You have two cows. Both cows are bloated with toxic steroids. They are set out to graze on privatized
public parks, release massive amounts of flatulence that destroys the ozone layer, die from excess
ultraviolet light, and are processed into meat-like products that look great as a result of clever and
unprincipled marketing strategies. When you mortgage your artificially devalued farm at high
interest rates in order to buy meat, you consume the poisoned material and develop terminal
illnesses because there is no health care plan to treat you. The corporate management uses your
purchase price to acquire THEIR meat from cows raised "naturally" on tree-free rain forest land
outside of the country where labor and resources are cheap.
MsRobbie - 01:44am Jan 27, 2001 EST (#89 of 614)
NEW EURO
You have two cows, both of which have Mad Cow Disease. You lie about it and sell the cows to another
European country.
wardaddy - 01:50am Jan 27, 2001 EST (#90 of 614)
Or ship them to Texas.
CooterBrown - 08:21am Jan 27, 2001 EST (#91 of 614)
Why are there so many posts about cat food?
The mighty Red - 10:15am Jan 27, 2001 EST (#92 of 614)
Because my cat has taken over Dave's job?
She's very concerned about her food.
(and Time/Warner/AOL has found that she'll work for dirt cheap...)
surferchicklet - 01:47pm Jan 27, 2001 EST (#93 of 614)
LOL... Love the cow post, Sher, and nice postscript MsR...
Cooter, we were talking about cat food cause we got tired of talking about you.
Bear Armstrong - 04:14pm Jan 27, 2001 EST (#94 of 614)
Cooter is no better than cat food?
I know Cooter can be strange at times, but I honestly thought people in general had a higher
opinion of him than that.
Anyway, does he work as dog food too? I'm always looking for a cheaper way to feed Jake.
surferchicklet - 04:32pm Jan 27, 2001 EST (#95 of 614)
He was calling our rodents cat food, Bear honey.
I like Cooter just fine, but Cali the wonder pig is not cat food... (neener neener neener Cooter)
Jake had his chance with our rodent..*S* Cooter would likely give him indigestion tho..LOL
freeindividual - 02:07pm Jan 28, 2001 EST (#96 of 614)
Over 18?
Here's Photos *G*
Duh_ - 01:42am Jan 29, 2001 EST (#97 of 614)
A) This is the BEST social thread on the board.... although I may tip my hat to the RR - it may (just
may be a tie)...
B) New RANT...
sjscruby - 01:50am Jan 29, 2001 EST (#98 of 614)
ROFL, free!!
Duh_ - 10:30pm Jan 29, 2001 EST (#99 of 614)
(((((i've pretty much decided today is my be-a-big-nasty-unsatisfied-bitch day))))
charolais - 11:22pm Jan 29, 2001 EST (#100 of 614)
(((((i've pretty much decided today is my be-a-big-nasty-unsatisfied-bitch day))))
oh, I'm with you.
Rule of thumb. Never, ever allow a 16 YO kid work a checking account on a computer for a business.
I'm cleaning up the mess now. Dear God.............
Duh_ - 12:58am Jan 30, 2001 EST (#101 of 614)
LOL...
Here's what up at my house...
The thing on my neck is a bandaid...
edrieanne - 01:35am Jan 30, 2001 EST (#102 of 614)
OOOOOOOooooo! a brown MOUSEY!
Cute! CUTER! CUTEST!
Mornin' Duh! Have the box packed, will send out tomorrow - flu bug has been keeping me down 'cept
when selling - will let you know how and when!
Duh_ - 11:21pm Jan 30, 2001 EST (#103 of 614)
I have a question for you all. What is the deal with MTV's "Undressed"? Whatthell kind of show is
this??!!!
ex-glencarr - 11:23pm Jan 30, 2001 EST (#104 of 614)
It's young girls In various stages of undress. The plots are about who's screwing whom.
Better living thru over-the-counter allergy meds [Duh_] - 11:43pm
Jan 30, 2001 EST (#105 of 647)
The plots are just about non existant, the acting is horrid, and the sex part is
very tame in terms of graphic detail. Softcore for the Britney Spears set?
Chicken is as chicken does. [CooterBrown] - 11:47pm Jan 30, 2001 EST
(#106 of 647)
Chicklet, Friday night is fine. Just don't wear panties this time, OK? ;-0
Thanks for the joy you're giving me [ex-glencarr] - 11:47pm Jan 30,
2001 EST (#107 of 647)
I think of it as the anti-"Oz".
Better living thru over-the-counter allergy meds [Duh_] - 11:49pm
Jan 30, 2001 EST (#108 of 647)
I should have known. Never doubt that if there is a way to underestimate the
capacity of thought in youth, MTV will find it..
Better living thru over-the-counter allergy meds [Duh_] - 11:50pm
Jan 30, 2001 EST (#109 of 647)
Cooter, you MADE Slurpy wear panties last Friday? Good god, man, is there not a
whisp of feminism in your being?
Better living thru over-the-counter allergy meds [Duh_] - 12:49am
Jan 31, 2001 EST (#110 of 647)
Heyho. Break in the action. Some interesting factoids:
I have 115 different jpgs of all you people of which around 110 are posted on
picture pages (some of you had them taken down...)
Of all the contributors, Wardaddy has the most jpgs in followed by Cooter....
Lots of you are tied at three submissions.
There has only been two people who have threaten the PPs, one of which
actually invaded RL and pissed me off.
There are about 9 submissions by people I haven't seen in about a year.
There are 39 pet submissions.
I have had over 4,000 hits since I have put these pages up...
[Bobbyc] - 01:46am Jan 31, 2001 EST (#111 of 647)
I just received this and thought I would pass it along.
Perhaps some of you could add to the list?
Guide for the Boys
The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month
when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in
his hands. This is a handy guide that should be as common as a
driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, or
significant other.
DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?
DANGEROUS: Are you wearing THAT?
SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown.
SAFEST: Wow! Look at you!
DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
SAFER: Could we be overreacting?
SAFEST: Here's fifty dollars.
DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?
And my personal favorite. . . . . . .
DANGEROUS: What did you DO all day?
SAFER: I hope you didn't overdo it today.
SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe.
[Bobbyc] - 10:43am Jan 31, 2001 EST (#112 of 647)
What, no Motherly advice for the Boys? :)
Chicken is as chicken does. [CooterBrown] - 11:19am Jan
31, 2001 EST (#113 of 647)
Dusty, I had nothing to do with her wearing panties. I was hoping
that she wouldn't. *G*
Endangered species...........................a [freeindividual] -
04:40pm Jan 31, 2001 EST (#114 of 647)
Elections are unnecessary!
All the organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to
decide who was the one in charge.
"I should be in charge, "said the brain, "Because I run all the
body's systems, so without me nothing would happen."
"I should be in charge" said the blood, "because I circulate oxygen
all over, so without me you'd all waste away."
"I should be in charge, " said the stomach, " because I process food
and give all of you energy."
"I should be in charge" said the legs, " because I carry the body
wherever it needs to go."
"I should be in charge" said the eyes, "because I allow the body to
see where it goes."
"I should be in charge, "said the rectum, "Because I'm responsible
for waste removal."
All the other body parts laughed at the rectum and insulted him,
so in a huff, he shut down tight.
Within a few days, the brain had a terrible headache, the stomach
was bloated, the legs got wobbly, the eyes got watery and the blood
was toxic.
They all decided that the rectum should be the boss.
The Moral of the story?
You don't have to be important to be in charge....Just an asshole!
Have a nice day...................
America: We can't count worth a damn, but we have
enough nukes to turn your country into a puddle of
molten glass. [Nigel] - 10:03pm Jan 31, 2001 EST (#115 of 647)
http://www.geocities.com/copper6500/homedepot.html
No. I really can't *feel your pain*... [surferchicklet] -
10:55pm Jan 31, 2001 EST (#116 of 647)
I don't generally, Cooter... *S*
Hi Free..
Duhoney... One thing people who work in schools agree is that we
have no trouble jumping on someone else's kids when they are
showing their ass in public like that... If the mom won't choke up
on them I will.
Better living thru over-the-counter allergy meds
[Duh_] - 11:26pm Jan 31, 2001 EST (#117 of 647)
I HATE Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher... I HATE
Microsoft Publisher...
No. I really can't *feel your pain*... [surferchicklet]
- 11:29pm Jan 31, 2001 EST (#118 of 647)
It's not good to hold things in Duh...
Tell us how you really feel..*g*
Better living thru over-the-counter allergy meds
[Duh_] - 11:55pm Jan 31, 2001 EST (#119 of 647)
PEOPLE, I beg of you... I implore you... if you are going to have
something professionally printed or worked on by a Service
Bureau, do NOT do it in Microsoft Publisher. NADA, NYET,
NONONO, NUHUH...
No. I really can't *feel your pain*... [surferchicklet]
- 12:05am Feb 1, 2001 EST (#120 of 647)
Ok.
BTW... this is my favorite chat thread too.*S*
Good night folks... early dayz...
Better living thru over-the-counter allergy meds
[Duh_] - 12:08am Feb 1, 2001 EST (#121 of 647)
nightynight...
Don't drop the soap. [wardaddy] - 12:19am Feb 1, 2001 EST
(#122 of 647)
Dean?
[Bobbyc] - 01:06am Feb 1, 2001 EST (#123 of 647)
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:
1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper
according to lights and darks.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see
your husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental
note -must do more sit-ups.
4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long
loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
5. Wash your hair once with Cucumber and Sage shampoo with
43 added vitamins.
6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
7. Condition your hair with Grapefruit Mint conditioner
enhanced with natural avacado oil. Leave on hair for fifteen
minutes.
8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for ten
minutes until red.
9. Wash entire rest of body with Ginger Nut and Jaffa Cake body
wash.
10. Rinse conditioner off hair (you must make sure that it has
all come off).
11. Shave armpits and legs. Consider shaving bikini area but
decide to get it waxed instead.
12. Scream loudly when your husband flushed the toilet and
you lose the water pressure.
13. Turn off the shower.
14. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots
with Tilex.
15. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
Wrap hair in super absorbent second towel.
16. Check entire body for the remotest sign of a zit, tweeze
hairs.
17. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel
on head.
18. If you see your husband along the way, cover up any
exposed areas and then sashay to bedroom to spend and hour
and a half getting dressed.
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and
leave them in a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see your wife along the
way, shake wiener at her making the "woo-woo" sound.
3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror and suck in your
gut to see if you have pecs (no). Admire the size of your wiener
in the mirror and scratch your butt.
4. Get in the shower.
5. Don't bother to look for a washcloth (you don't use one).
6. Wash your face.
7. Wash your armpits.
8. Blow your nose in your hands, then let the water just rinse it
off.
9. Crack up at how loud your fart sounds in the shower.
10. Majority of time is spent washing your privates and
surrounding area.
11. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs on the soap
bar.
12. Shampoo your hair (do not use conditioner).
13. Make a shampoo Mohawk.
14. Peek out of shower curtain to look at yourself in the mirror
again.
15. Pee (in the shower).
16. Rinse off and get out of the shower. Fail to notice water on
the floor because you left the curtain hanging out of the tub
the whole time.
17. Partially dry off.
18. Look at yourself in the mirror, flex muscles, admire wiener
size again.
19. Leave shower curtain open and wet bath mat on the floor.
20. Leave bathroom fan and light on.
21. Return to the bedroom with towel around your waist. If you
pass your wife, pull off the towel, shake wiener at her, and
make the "woo-woo" sound again.
22. Throw wet towel on the bed. Take 2 minutes to get dressed.
Better living thru over-the-counter allergy meds
[Duh_] - 04:05am Feb 1, 2001 EST (#124 of 647)
And yet another installment of the vacation rant...
When you seek revenge, dig two graves. - Proverb
[_maggie_] - 04:35am Feb 1, 2001 EST (#125 of 647)
Good column, sweets. :^)
I think I'll be gay for a day. [CooterBrown] - 06:55am
Feb 1, 2001 EST (#126 of 647)
That was pretty, Dusty.
I like women who don't wear panties. I suppose I'd better
change the subject, though.
Cold weather is back. YUCK!
[Riona] - 12:20pm Feb 1, 2001 EST (#127 of 647)
Very cool column Duhoney...
Cooter... you would like a woman who wore red wool flannel
long johns if she gave you some.*S*
I think I'll be gay for a day. [CooterBrown] - 01:37pm
Feb 1, 2001 EST (#128 of 647)
Well!
What can I say? *G*
[sjscruby] - 08:16pm Feb 1, 2001 EST (#129 of 647)
LOL, duh....sounds like soooooooooooo much fun. (ok, SOME of it
does) *gggg*
[guy montag] - 09:55pm Feb 1, 2001 EST (#130 of 647)
Uhhhhh Cooter???
Better living thru over-the-counter allergy meds
[Duh_] - 10:40pm Feb 1, 2001 EST (#131 of 647)
Did you know that I have an apparently devoted following of at
least 11 people who check every week on that column? It was
news to me...
PF's resident 'cranky pain in the butt'... [guy montag]
- 10:47pm Feb 1, 2001 EST (#132 of 647)
<cough><cough> Twelve. <cough><cough>
Well, almost every week...
Better living thru over-the-counter allergy meds
[Duh_] - 10:50pm Feb 1, 2001 EST (#133 of 647)
ahh... so your the guy at HORNDOGGIE_TELENET.....
PF's resident 'cranky pain in the butt'... [guy montag]
- 10:55pm Feb 1, 2001 EST (#134 of 647)
Huh???
Nope, not me... Uh, er, I, uh...
;)
Loligagers.... everyone of‘em... [Duh_] - 12:56am Feb 2,
2001 EST (#135 of 647)
Yeah, sure, big daddy.... (pretty soon that’ll have a WHOLE
new connotation to it...)
Put a stop to inbreeding- ban country music!!!
[charolais] - 01:04am Feb 2, 2001 EST (#136 of 647)
so what number am I?
I got new license plates.... heh heh, no hiding out anymore.
like I ever really could!
Loligagers.... everyone of‘em... [Duh_] - 01:19am Feb 2,
2001 EST (#137 of 647)
I see you on there toooo.... Noone can hide.....
Put a stop to inbreeding- ban country music!!!
[charolais] - 01:24am Feb 2, 2001 EST (#138 of 647)
heh heh heh ........
MOO.
I think I'll be gay for a day. [CooterBrown] - 06:58am
Feb 2, 2001 EST (#139 of 647)
I'm trying to decide whether to pull out some ribeyes for
supper, or thaw out that pork loin roast and smoke that sucker.
Put a stop to inbreeding- ban country music!!!
[charolais] - 07:56am Feb 2, 2001 EST (#140 of 647)
I'm trying to decide whether to pull out some
ribeyes for supper, or thaw out that pork loin
roast and smoke that sucker.
Let me help, bend over and I'll get those ribeyes yanked out.
Wouldn't you have to dry out the pork really well before you
smoke it, Coot?
Don't drop the soap. [wardaddy] - 08:31am Feb 2, 2001 EST
(#141 of 647)
It's Sauce Bolognese with pasta and a marinated vegetable salad
for me tonight. Off in a bit to make my groceries.
Susan [sjscruby] - 08:59am Feb 2, 2001 EST (#142 of 647)
ok...I guess I'm heading for Mississippi for supper---not sure
whether to go to Cooter's or Wardaddy's, though.
hmmmmmmmmm....decisions, decisions...
Endangered species...........................a [freeindividual]
- 11:05am Feb 2, 2001 EST (#143 of 647)
Q: My wife/girlfriend says I should cut down on meat and eat
more fruits and vegetables. A: Your wife just doesn't grasp
logistical efficiencies the way you do. Look, what does a cow
eat? Corn. And what's corn? A vegetable. So a steak is nothing
more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to
your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source
of field grass. And a pork chop can give you 100% of your
recommended daily allowance of slop.
I think I'll be gay for a day. [CooterBrown] - 11:11am
Feb 2, 2001 EST (#144 of 647)
Dry it out? No way! I not only keep it moist while it's smoking, I
inject the hummer beforehand.
Men argue, nature acts. ~Voltaire [surferchicklet] -
11:44pm Feb 2, 2001 EST (#145 of 647)
Well, okeydokey then... Cooter's pork butts shoot up?
I'll be passing on the barbeque... might be worse than mad cow
disease...
I have this strange yen for meatloaf... haven't had it in almost a
year... Chicklita wants to do burgers tomorrow so I can kill two
birds with one stone... or, uh... buy enough for both at any rate.
Men argue, nature acts. ~Voltaire [surferchicklet] -
11:46pm Feb 2, 2001 EST (#146 of 647)
Just wondering, Cooter... exactly how is it you tie off a vein in a
pig's ass?
{{Chicklet ...confused as to the location of the tourniqet (and
the spelling of it)}}
If you don't like to fish, you might be a commie.
[CooterBrown] - 12:38am Feb 3, 2001 EST (#147 of 647)
Chicklet, the shoulder especially will hold a lot of moisture. One
of the injections that we use is to dissolve a bunch of our rub in
water, and then inject it. I have a couple of small injectors, and
we have a large one also.
If I told you what else we used, I'd have to do something to you.
;-)
If life was fair, there would be no Martha Stewart
[wardaddy] - 11:38am Feb 3, 2001 EST (#148 of 647)
SC
I use injectors too. You fill them - as Cooter says - with a
mixture of rub mixed with water (or wine). You take the
injector and plunge it in all of the way then back it out,
squeezing out a little of the mixture at a time. It gives the meat
a wonderful flavor and makes it very moist.
This works with any meat, by the way and if you look around,
you may be able to find some marinade that is sold with the
injectors. Cajun Injector is one brand. It comes with the
injector for about $4.00. The injector itself costs $6.00-$8.00 in
the catalogs. I buy the Cajun Injector marinade, tear off the
injector, and throw the marinade away.
Vinegar and oil based salad dressings are good with chicken,
beef, and pork.
Endangered species...........................a [freeindividual]
- 05:21pm Feb 3, 2001 EST (#149 of 647)
In case ya get bored, try this
Susan [sjscruby] - 09:36pm Feb 3, 2001 EST (#150 of 647)
omigawd---I heard about that on the radio!
Endangered species...........................a [freeindividual]
- 07:09pm Feb 4, 2001 EST (#151 of 647)
K-9 letters to God
Dear God,
How come people love to smell flowers, but seldom, if ever,
smell one another? Where are their priorities?
Dear God,
When we get to Heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it the
same old story?
Dear God,
Excuse me, but why are there cars named after the jaguar, the
cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but
not one named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding
around? We dogs love a nice ride! I know every breed cannot
have its own model, but it would be easy to rename the Chrysler
Eagle the Chrysler Beagle!
Dear God,
If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears
him, is he still a bad dog?
Dear God,
When my foster mom's friend comes over to our house, he
smells like musk! What's he been rolling around in?
Dear God,
Is it true that in Heaven, dining room tables have on-ramps?
Dear God,
If we come back as humans, is that good or bad?
Dear God,
More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.
Dear God,
When we get to the Pearly Gates, do we have to shake hands to
get in?
Dear God,
We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand
signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent IDs,
electromagnetic energy fields, and frisbee flight paths. What
do humans understand?
Dear God,
Are there dogs on other planets, or are we alone? I have been
howling at the moon and stars for a long time, but all I ever
hear back is the beagle across the street!
Dear God,
Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to
apologize?
Dear God,
Is it true that dogs are not allowed in restaurants because we
can't make up our minds what NOT to order? Or is it the carpets
again?
Dear God,
When my family eats dinner they always bless their food. But
they never bless mine. So, I've been wagging my tail extra fast
when they pour fill my bowl. Have you noticed my own
blessing?
Dear God,
I've always lived at the shelter and I have everything I need.
But many of the cats here have names and I don't. Could you
give me a name please? It would be good for my self-esteem.
Dear God,
The new terrier I live with just peed on the Oriental rug and I
have a feeling my family might blame me 'cuz they think I'm
jealous of this stupid dog. Since they have no sense of smell,
how can I convince them I'm innocent? Does Petsmart sell lie
detectors?
Susan [sjscruby] - 09:20pm Feb 5, 2001 EST (#152 of 647)
heh heh heh---good ones, free. *g*
Loligagers.... everyone of‘em... [Duh_] - 10:29pm Feb 5,
2001 EST (#153 of 647)
My puter didn’t come today... blue am I....
Susan [sjscruby] - 10:35pm Feb 5, 2001 EST (#154 of 647)
awwwwwwww, duh----that SUCKS!!!!!
Men argue, nature acts. ~Voltaire [surferchicklet] -
10:42pm Feb 5, 2001 EST (#155 of 647)
Maybe it'll be there tomorrow?
Loligagers.... everyone of‘em... [Duh_] - 10:58pm Feb 5,
2001 EST (#156 of 647)
But the good news is, I got my tax refund today...
Loligagers.... everyone of‘em... [Duh_] - 11:01pm Feb 5,
2001 EST (#157 of 647)
Well, they said the computer would be here in 2 to 4 weeks.
Now, by my estimation, 1 day to process order, 1 day pack it up,
1 day waiting to be delivered, 1 day to be picked up and trucked
off, 2 days to transit to my part of the country, 1 day to be
offloaded and documented, 1 day to wait, and 1 day to deliver to
my door.... that’s... seven days.... ok. I may be jumping the gun
here....
Men argue, nature acts. ~Voltaire [surferchicklet] -
11:13pm Feb 5, 2001 EST (#158 of 647)
Yay tax refund...
Uh, Duh... the way that really works tho... if they say "2 to 4
weeks.." it is like... one day for order to sit in someone's in box,
with them busy... next day for them to have the day off. Then
they get back to work, discuss with co-workers what they did
on the day off ... and worked on the in box... then after lunch
more working on in box, going back to the people who took the
orders to get numbers that weren't put on the original order.
Next day they process your order, give it to the pullers who clip
it to their pile and continue pulling other orders.
After lunch they continue pulling orders and maybe yours is
there, but probably not. So the next day they come in and it is
pulled before lunch. Then it is sent to the packers. The packers
are *packing* so they're a little slower than usual... but they
get it packed *by some miricle) the second day...
Then it sits for a day waiting to be delivered.
It goes from there to the Delivery people, to their warehouse.
Where it is tracked so that everyone knows exactly where your
package is. (It's in the warehouse... ) so then the next day it
starts to Witchita, where it waits in the warehouse a day... then
it goes out on the truck to your home...
So...
Men argue, nature acts. ~Voltaire [surferchicklet] -
11:14pm Feb 5, 2001 EST (#159 of 647)
At least 1 1/2 to 2 weeks unless some one else needs the day
off...*G*
jumping to conclusions is not like jumping rope!
[edrieanne] - 01:35am Feb 6, 2001 EST (#160 of 647)
oh, duh, if you get a little box tomorrow or wednesday, please
don't panic. your computer didn't get wet and shrink! *g*
Loligagers.... everyone of‘em... [Duh_] - 02:59am Feb 6,
2001 EST (#161 of 647)
Two questions:
A) Can guinea pigs eat hamster food and vice versa?
B) Guinea pigs can coexist peacefully with hamsters? Guinea
pigs wouldn't eat a hamster?
Loligagers.... everyone of‘em... [Duh_] - 04:29am Feb 6,
2001 EST (#162 of 647)
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>mourn<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
The Millenium Board is gone...
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>mourn<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
If you don't like to fish, you might be a commie.
[CooterBrown] - 06:38am Feb 6, 2001 EST (#163 of 647)
Dusty, at least you don't have to wait on a branch of the
gubmint for your new puter. I turned the PR in two weeks ago,
and nothing has happened yet. It's on somebody's desk. :-(
You're crunchy and taste good with ketchup.-Dragon
[Riona] - 07:59am Feb 6, 2001 EST (#164 of 647)
Guinea Pigs need G Pig food... I do give mine a little or the
mouse's hamster food as a treat...
They need the green pellets tho... They LOVE hay... or mine
does... and that needs to be a large part of their diet ...
The hay cubes are good because they keep their teeth worn
down as well...and they need a couple of carrots a week for the
Vitamin C...
Gotta go...
Endangered species...........................a [freeindividual]
- 03:54pm Feb 6, 2001 EST (#165 of 647)
Subject: The Difference Between Republicans and
Democrats
A Republican and a Democrat were walking down the street
when they came to a homeless person. The Republican gave the
homeless person his business card and told him to come to his
business for a job. He then took twenty dollars out of his pocket
and gave it to the homeless person.
The Democrat was very impressed, and when they came to
another homeless person, he decided to help. He walked over to
the homeless person and gave him directions to the welfare
office. He then reached into the Republican's pocket and gave
the homeless person fifty dollars.
If you don't like to fish, you might be a commie.
[CooterBrown] - 03:56pm Feb 6, 2001 EST (#166 of 647)
Heehee......
Endangered species...........................a [freeindividual]
- 04:30pm Feb 6, 2001 EST (#167 of 647)
J
Loligagers.... everyone of‘em... [Duh_] - 12:16am Feb 7,
2001 EST (#168 of 647)
Update... on the am I hot or not quest.... My score is up to 4....
and I'm not even showing my tits...
And today I found out that I have ANOTHER week of vacation.
I'm thinking... MACWORLD NY in JULY!!!
[lara croft] - 01:11am Feb 7, 2001 EST (#169 of 647)
Millenium Board???????
[lara croft] - 01:13am Feb 7, 2001 EST (#170 of 647)
Oh you'll love NY in July, Duh. LOL it's uh, NY in July.
You gonna stay at the Plaza?
Loligagers.... everyone of‘em... [Duh_] - 01:42am Feb 7,
2001 EST (#171 of 647)
Millenium board... small little board that hosted my "THE TIME
IS NYE (NIGH): Y3K doomsday thread..." woe....
Big GUY and little GUY...
Loligagers.... everyone of‘em... [Duh_] - 01:46am Feb 7,
2001 EST (#172 of 647)
NY would be cool, if I had ANY money....
My PC is warm. I think the firewall is acting up.
[MsRobbie] - 01:52am Feb 7, 2001 EST (#173 of 647)
Wow! An early picture of Future President Guyling! Thanks,
New Dad and Duh, for getting that up so fast.
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 04:50am Feb 7, 2001 EST (#175 of 647)
New RANT..
1000 points of light and we got the dim one...
[SherrieG] - 09:18am Feb 7, 2001 EST (#176 of 647)
And not a WORD about Malibu or Pacific Coast Highway.
Susan [sjscruby] - 09:55am Feb 7, 2001 EST (#177 of 647)
Wow, great pic---thanx to Guy and duh! I see he has all the hair
his dad DOESN'T have. LOL
And so the wheel turns . . .firelight! [BrujaVerde] -
09:58am Feb 7, 2001 EST (#178 of 647)
Hi, Duh, sorry to hear about your little friend. I know how you
feel about critters. I hope school is going well for you! I have a
great, new family photo for your pages, I'll be sure to email to
you. Updated Halloween shot from 2000.
Don't worry, all the little critters you've loved in life are
somewhere in critter heaven, waiting for you!!
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 07:37pm Feb 7, 2001 EST (#179 of 647)
1000 points of light and we got the dim one...
[SherrieG] - 09:18am Feb 7, 2001 EST (#176 of 178)
And not a WORD about Malibu or Pacific Coast
Highway.
Ex-squeeze-me, but I think I gave you a purdy great write up in
the column before???????
Edrie, got my box of toys today. OMYGOD!! You are truly
FABULOUS!!! All the stuff was PRIMO GREAT!!! You are an ANGEL.
Next year, if you are still batting about SF, I’m taking YOU to
MacWorld - you’ve got the touch to get the REALLY COOL TOYS
.... The Doggies say THANK YOU and WE LOVE OUR BONES.. and
the MOUSEY eventually came out of his little igloo to sniff and
chew on the whatever-thing you sent it. You have outdone
yourself, my deary... I just can’t put it into words... (I’ll put a
picture of of the cool crap tonight when I get home)....
Another thing that floored me today... Usually I get about 11
hits a day on that RANT thing I do. It has gradually increased
one or two a week since I had started this. From having 11 hits
on it on Feb. 6, it jumped to having 49 hits on it today. Jumping
Jesus.... I am truly shocked....
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 07:39pm Feb 7, 2001 EST (#180 of 647)
Don't worry, all the little critters you've loved in life
are somewhere in critter heaven, waiting for you!!
Well, if they are in heaven, I hope I can get a
get-out-of-Hell-for-a-day pass to visit them. School was/is too
cool. I had to drop the morning class because I over estimated
my movtivation level at that time of day. I think in the summer
I may take that pot throwing deal.. or one of them liberal artsy
fartsy classes...
Susan [sjscruby] - 08:07pm Feb 7, 2001 EST (#181 of 647)
LOL---loved the latest rant---and I don't blame you for loving
SF---so do I!!!
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 08:11pm Feb 7, 2001 EST (#182 of 647)
Be careful, Sue, you be joining into a small, vehement, deeply
disturbed little congregation that reads the RANT... the powers
that be might take away all your credit card priviledges and
make you submit to urinalysis....
If life was fair, there would be no Martha Stewart
[wardaddy] - 08:47pm Feb 7, 2001 EST (#183 of 647)
Well, I never! I read it. Sorry that I couldn't make it.
Susan [sjscruby] - 09:20pm Feb 7, 2001 EST (#184 of 647)
YIKES!!!!
Endangered species...........................a [freeindividual]
- 09:58pm Feb 7, 2001 EST (#185 of 648)
WEATHER FORECASTING
To tell the weather, go to your back door and look for the dog.
If the dog is at the door and he is wet, it's probably raining.
But if the dog is standing there really soaking wet, it is
probably raining really hard.
If the dog's fur looks like it's been rubbed the wrong way, it's
probably windy.
If the dog has snow on his back, it's probably snowing.
Of course, to be able to tell the weather like this, you have to
leave the dog outside all the time, especially if you expect bad
weather.
Sincerely, The CAT
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 10:26pm Feb 7, 2001 EST (#186 of 648)
WOOWOO. I have a web host... So, if anybody wants, you guys can
get web addies with @duhspot.net on them. Kewl, eh?
Susan [sjscruby] - 10:28pm Feb 7, 2001 EST (#187 of 648)
me!! me!! me!!! *ggg*
Endangered species...........................a [freeindividual]
- 10:28pm Feb 7, 2001 EST (#188 of 648)
CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!
Susan [sjscruby] - 10:34pm Feb 7, 2001 EST (#189 of 648)
Hi, free. ;)
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 10:46pm Feb 7, 2001 EST (#190 of 648)
Susan [sjscruby] - 10:28pm Feb 7, 2001 EST (#187 of
189)
me!! me!! me!!! *ggg*
Well, you just come on down and email me... and we’ll get ya set
up!!
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 10:47pm Feb 7, 2001 EST (#191 of 648)
MUHHAAAAAA.... I am MASTER of my own DOMAIN!!!
If you don't like to fish, you might be a commie.
[CooterBrown] - 10:53pm Feb 7, 2001 EST (#192 of 648)
Hey Greenie!!
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 11:01pm Feb 7, 2001 EST (#193 of 648)
The RANT audience has set a record for hits in a single day....
for Feb. 7 (and we still have about two hours left) RANT hits
have climbed to 61.
So, what do you think is happening here since yesterday my
record high was 11? Did somebody post the URL on a porn site
or what?
Susan [sjscruby] - 11:03pm Feb 7, 2001 EST (#194 of 648)
heh heh heh...that MUST be it, duh.
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 11:11pm Feb 7, 2001 EST (#195 of 648)
It could be a government conspiracy - that carnivore sniffer
software found out about my site and dozens upon dozens of
federal agents are logging on to the RANT as we speak. Head
Justice Department officials are probably on there way to my
house right now...
FIGHT THE POWER!!! FREE DUH!!! FREE
DUH!!!!
Susan [sjscruby] - 11:16pm Feb 7, 2001 EST (#196 of 648)
hmmmmmm...sounds like I topic for the Rev....
Men argue, nature acts. ~Voltaire [surferchicklet] -
12:05am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#197 of 648)
More hits? Cool beans... *g*
Men argue, nature acts. ~Voltaire [surferchicklet] -
12:06am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#198 of 648)
Oh!
I loved reading about the trip... and congratulations on the
domain thing... going to email you now..*S*
jumping to conclusions is not like jumping rope!
[edrieanne] - 12:37am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#199 of 648)
omiGOD! Dusty, I am SOOOOOOO sorry!
I KNEW I should have sent the tee shirt from the Inauguration
protest under separate plain brown wrapper! They're looking
for ME! DANG!
quickly stuffing face to add pounds so Secret Service won't recognize
face! ........
jumping to conclusions is not like jumping rope!
[edrieanne] - 12:40am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#200 of 648)
glad you got the pack, D, "you" had a great time collecting all
that stuff! I can certainly attest to that!
And, you description of MWorld fits to a tee! It was such a blast!
Thanks for the opportunity to go - I wouldn't have done it if it
hadn't been for you!
Next year, I'd LOVE to go - but we'll have to take those portable
bags with LARGE wheels!
you know, the ones large enough to hold a "cow lookalike"! *g*
or, one of those cute reps, or......that flat monitor.......or.......
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 01:27am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#201 of 648)
We DO have a good time here, don't we....
jumping to conclusions is not like jumping rope!
[edrieanne] - 03:40am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#202 of 648)
"we" also had a great time in SF on the last FRIDAY of
MACWORLD, too! *g*
yup, and a fun time was had by ALL!
If you don't like to fish, you might be a commie.
[CooterBrown] - 06:32am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#203 of 648)
This was one of those mornings where I woke up about an hour
before the alarm is set to go off, and couldn't go back to sleep.
There was nobody to play with (as usual), so I finally got up.
Dusty, I hadn't read The Rant before. Cool!
jumping to conclusions is not like jumping rope!
[edrieanne] - 06:53am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#204 of 648)
Morning, Cooter! How's stuff?
SF was really a lot of fun, really glad to have had a chance to
get together with the PF crew - Dusty loaned me her Macworld
pass, and on Fri I got to go play her for the day! LOVED
Macworld!
If you can get out here, there may not be a Macworld, but I'm
sure those locals of us can find something to keep you
entertained!
PF's resident 'cranky pain in the butt'... [guy montag]
- 09:03am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#205 of 648)
Duh
Thanks for posting the pic... Of course, that picture doesn't do
my little boy any justice -- he's about a zillion times more
beautiful in real life... (And I say this after he's kept me up all
night, too...)
I've got over 40 pictures on the digital camera alone... Once
they're downloaded to my website, I'll post a link...
NOTE to 85lb Chihuahua": My feet are NOT chewtoys!
[edrieanne] - 09:05am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#206 of 648)
Guy, he looks just GORGEOUS to us!
congrats, big Guy!
PF's resident 'cranky pain in the butt'... [guy montag]
- 09:07am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#207 of 648)
Thanks edrie!
There's one picture my mother-in-law took of me at one point...
I've got my "New Dad" hat, my "New Dad" T-Shirt, and my "New
Dad" coffee mug... and a smile from ear to ear that would
probably set off a geiger counter... *G*
We're all hypocrites on this bus... [Rocket Man 57] -
09:08am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#208 of 648)
"Malibu or Pacific Coast Highway"
Ooops.
There goes another pair of briefs...
1000 points of light and we got the dim one...
[SherrieG] - 09:11am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#209 of 648)
I am just delighted for ya, Guy, even if you DON'T return
voicemail.
Try not to freak out when you realize there is no instruction
manual enclosed.
NOTE to 85lb Chihuahua": My feet are NOT chewtoys!
[edrieanne] - 09:11am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#210 of 648)
can't wait to see 'em! Keep us posted! (or rather, keep those PICS
posted)
If life was fair, there would be no Martha Stewart
[wardaddy] - 09:13am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#211 of 648)
I remeber my oldest son's words when my grandson was
switched to baby food after Dani had been nursing him _ "His
s**t stinks, Dad!"
PF's resident 'cranky pain in the butt'... [guy montag]
- 09:13am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#212 of 648)
Sherrie
I am just delighted for ya, Guy, even if you DON'T
return voicemail.
[scratching head]
Hmmmm... Is this a hint? It's so subtle I may have missed it...
*G*
Sherrie, baby, believe me, I would be delighted to return your
call... and I will... as soon as I can catch my breath...
Try not to freak out when you realize there is no
instruction manual enclosed.
Oh, believe me, after last night I know this explicitly... Poor
little guy insisted on waking up every hour ~ hour and a half...
*yawn*
wardaddy
I remeber my oldest son's words when my
grandson was switched to baby food after Dani
had been nursing him _ "His s**t stinks, Dad!"
Luckily, I know this little factoid already... One of the
advantages to being the last of our group of friends to have
kids... (the best advantage, of course, is the hand-me-downs and
loaners, like the gorgeous handmade crib my son is sleeping in
right now...)
We're all hypocrites on this bus... [Rocket Man 57] -
09:14am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#213 of 648)
as soon as I can catch my breath...
Haven't quit smoking?
Or just 'cheating'?
LOL
1000 points of light and we got the dim one...
[SherrieG] - 09:15am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#214 of 648)
Yeah, you have had about the last sleep-in morning you are
gonna have for the next six years or so...
PF's resident 'cranky pain in the butt'... [guy montag]
- 09:16am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#215 of 648)
Rocketman
Haven't quit smoking?
Right now I'd be unconscious if I hadn't quit smoking...
Sherrie
Yeah, you have had about the last sleep-in
morning you are gonna have for the next six
years or so...
That'd be true if Joey was going to be an only child, perhaps...
*G*
I Have Friends In Low Places [spoonbill] - 09:19am Feb 8,
2001 EST (#216 of 648)
Say Guy....are you taking any applications for prospective
Honorary GrandParents ala digital connections?
By the way, I'm still grinning for you and yours.
I've got two Grands due in March and August. Hmmmm.. 5 up at
bat and 2 on deck. I'm going broke.
We're all hypocrites on this bus... [Rocket Man 57] -
09:22am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#217 of 648)
Your wife threatened to brain ya, eh Guy?
PF's resident 'cranky pain in the butt'... [guy montag]
- 09:33am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#218 of 648)
boomer
Say Guy....are you taking any applications for
prospective Honorary GrandParents ala digital
connections?
Actually, MsRobbie has already applied to be an honorary
"Online Grandma"... You'd be a perfect bookend "Online
Grandpa"... *G*
By the way, I'm still grinning for you and yours.
Thanks man... It's been a quite hectic past few days, but I
wouldn't trade it for anything...
Rocketman
Your wife threatened to brain ya, eh Guy?
Heh heh heh. Pretty much...
Well, that and I've been running around so much the past
couple of weeks that I would have gone into an asthmatic fit...
NOTE to 85lb Chihuahua": My feet are NOT chewtoys!
[edrieanne] - 09:43am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#219 of 648)
btw, did you know that a "joey" is a baby kangaroo? Remember
that when Mom (and you, too) start packing the wee one
around in one of those cute "baby back pack bags"!
NOTE to 85lb Chihuahua": My feet are NOT chewtoys!
[edrieanne] - 09:48am Feb 8, 2001 EST (#220 of 652)
well, I'm turning into a pumpkin, so, nite all - til tonite!
have a good day, folks, and good luck on catching some
zzzzzzzzzz'z, guy! best to momma guy and the guyling.
FREE NOEL1! [Blackricco] - 07:26pm Feb 8, 2001 EST (#221 of
652)
Check out THIS site! Whew!
Endangered species...........................a [freeindividual]
- 11:34pm Feb 8, 2001 EST (#222 of 652)
Blackricco
Now THAT is a link!!!!!! (*#~ @^*)&~! for sure!!!
NOTE to 85lb Chihuahua": My feet are NOT chewtoys!
[edrieanne] - 11:39pm Feb 8, 2001 EST (#223 of 652)
AWESO
ME!!!
[lara croft] - 12:55am Feb 9, 2001 EST (#224 of 652)
Damn, that's the coolest site yet.
Susan [sjscruby] - 05:28am Feb 9, 2001 EST (#225 of 652)
WOW!!!
I Have Friends In Low Places [spoonbill] - 11:31am Feb 9,
2001 EST (#226 of 652)
Drew my Virus scan out of hidding.
Susan [sjscruby] - 11:57am Feb 9, 2001 EST (#227 of 652)
lolol, boomer.
And so the wheel turns . . .firelight! [BrujaVerde] -
11:58am Feb 9, 2001 EST (#228 of 652)
Hey Greenie!!<
Hi, Cooter, :) Miss you!
Yeah, you have had about the last sleep-in
morning you are gonna have for the next six
years or so... <
Oh, gawd, Sherrie, isn't that the truth. I can remember way
back when, sleep in the morning, on Saturday's sometimes till
2:00!
Never, never, ever, more..... As much as I love my twin terrors,
I HATE THEIR WAKE UP TIME!
"Momma, I wanna snuggle..."
"Okay, but it's still dark outside, go back to sleep."
{Other kid} "I want Mamma!"
"NO, I want Mamma!"
(crying now) "I want Daddy!"
"Where's my lion?"
"I want Juice."
Me - be quiet, go back to sleep, we're tired. (It's 5:30).
"No, I want juice."
(Other kid) "I want milk, HOT milk!"
Trudge*trudge*trudge*
"Okay, here's your drinks, now sleep."
"We want to watch a show!"
"Go play!, leave us alone."
"NO, WE WANT TO WATCH A SHOW!" (dual toddler cry)
Accck, no sleep.
It's terminal.
Susan [sjscruby] - 01:59pm Feb 9, 2001 EST (#229 of 652)
Dusty, when are you gonna get one of THESE??? *g*
FOX News: "We Fart - You Sniff" [Oregon_Jim] - 09:20pm
Feb 9, 2001 EST (#230 of 652)
Try this one: http://www.thinkmango.com
This is as good as it gets.
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 09:54pm Feb 9, 2001 EST (#231 of 652)
Susan [sjscruby] - 01:59pm Feb 9, 2001 EST (#229 of
230)
Dusty, when are you gonna get one of THESE??? *g*
When I sell 3 grand worth of blood...
Susan [sjscruby] - 09:54pm Feb 9, 2001 EST (#232 of 652)
Another good one, Jim...
Men argue, nature acts. ~Voltaire [surferchicklet] -
09:56pm Feb 9, 2001 EST (#233 of 652)
That's cool, OJ... Thanks...
Ricco... The *sniffer* thing set off my alarm and I bailed...
sorry...
FREE NOEL1! [Blackricco] - 10:06pm Feb 9, 2001 EST (#234 of
652)
Nice one Jim... Balthaser Studios premiers their new site on
Monday. It should be pretty interesting.
LOL Chicklet, go back and check it out. The "Movietone" news
spoof is pretty good. The whole site is pretty cool.
FOX News: "We Fart - You Sniff" [Oregon_Jim] - 10:08pm
Feb 9, 2001 EST (#235 of 652)
Blackricco
The problem with creating "cutting edge" or "bleeding edge"
web sites is trying to get the mother-f***ers to work with
Netscape 6.0.
No small feat.
Men argue, nature acts. ~Voltaire [surferchicklet] -
10:09pm Feb 9, 2001 EST (#236 of 652)
And I run Netscape...
FOX News: "We Fart - You Sniff" [Oregon_Jim] - 10:11pm
Feb 9, 2001 EST (#237 of 652)
Netscape 6.0 is a total piece of crap.
Is this the best that AOL/Time-Warner can pull off?
LMAO
Susan [sjscruby] - 10:14pm Feb 9, 2001 EST (#238 of 652)
I read today that the next release (6.1??) was available via FTP,
tho' maybe not at the web site yet...and I agree, Jim---I have
been a longtime Netscape user and fan, but I am using IE now
(and I NEVER liked IE). 6.0 totally wrecked it for me. YUCK!!!!
FOX News: "We Fart - You Sniff" [Oregon_Jim] - 10:16pm
Feb 9, 2001 EST (#239 of 652)
Susan
You're right - Netscape 6.1 is available.
But I wouldn't bother - it is still a piece of crap.
Susan [sjscruby] - 10:24pm Feb 9, 2001 EST (#240 of 652)
When I sell 3 grand worth of blood...
LOLOL
Men argue, nature acts. ~Voltaire [surferchicklet] -
10:24pm Feb 9, 2001 EST (#241 of 652)
I don't have 6.0... I heard the upgrade sucked before I had a
chance to go and get it..
I like the one I use...
I hate IE...
Susan [sjscruby] - 10:24pm Feb 9, 2001 EST (#242 of 652)
*sigh* I figgered, oj...
sc---I've got the new IE (5.5), and have had good luck with it.
FOX News: "We Fart - You Sniff" [Oregon_Jim] - 10:27pm
Feb 9, 2001 EST (#243 of 652)
The "new" Microsoft Internet Explorer (currently available for
Mac) for Windows will be featuring the new browser engine -
Tasmen - killer all the way around.
Netscape is a dead issue.
If you don't like to fish, you might be a commie.
[CooterBrown] - 10:39pm Feb 9, 2001 EST (#244 of 652)
Why anybody uses Netscape is beyond me. It SUCKS!
FOX News: "We Fart - You Sniff" [Oregon_Jim] - 10:42pm
Feb 9, 2001 EST (#245 of 652)
Cooter
Netscape was simply an argument against the DOJ's action
relative to the MicroSoft deal.
This piece of software is 4 years old - it's a joke from a web
development perspective - impossible to design "around" and
hardly worth the effort given it's market share - less than 8%.
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 10:43pm Feb 9, 2001 EST (#246 of 652)
Have I told you chowderheads that I use Netscape 4.76?
And that I love it?
And naddating can make me change...
Thanks for asking...
FOX News: "We Fart - You Sniff" [Oregon_Jim] - 10:44pm
Feb 9, 2001 EST (#247 of 652)
Just don't try to design a "high-end" web site using Netscape's
DOM.
An absolute joke.
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 10:48pm Feb 9, 2001 EST (#248 of 652)
Well. IE makes me vomit. I’ve always said that Apple should
design a Macintosh specific/optimized browser with an
integrated email client.
FOX News: "We Fart - You Sniff" [Oregon_Jim] - 10:49pm
Feb 9, 2001 EST (#249 of 652)
Duh
Look for one with Mac OS X within 6 months.
And it will not be iCab!
Good news!
Endangered species...........................a [freeindividual]
- 11:35pm Feb 9, 2001 EST (#250 of 652)
THREE ENGINEERS
There are three engineers in a car: an electrical engineer, a
chemical engineer and a Microsoft engineer. Suddenly the car
engine shuts off, leaving the three engineers stranded by the
side of the road. All three engineers look at each other
wondering what could be wrong.
The electrical engineer suggests stripping down the
electronics of the car and trying to trace where a fault might
have occurred.
The chemical engineer, not knowing much about cars, suggests
that maybe the fuel is becoming emulsified and getting blocked
somewhere.
Then, the Microsoft engineer, not knowing much about
anything, comes up with a suggestion, "Why don`t we close all
the windows, get out, get back in, open the windows again, and
maybe it`ll work !?"
Men argue, nature acts. ~Voltaire [surferchicklet] -
12:13am Feb 10, 2001 EST (#251 of 652)
I don't like IE because when you are looking for anything it
doesn't give you what you want... it gives you the MS storbrand
instead... and would not go to Linux built sites... (long ago..)
then it wouldn't let me download Netscape... I told it F-You...
went and got an old slow browser... went back and uninstalled
everything from IE to the help files for it, went online with the
dino browser, downloaded the 4.9 standalone, (I think that was
it) and have used it for a couple years... I haven't used IE
since... and can now get to the Linux sites I want...
I don't care for being told I can't go somewhere, or do
something..*G*
NOTE to 85lb Chihuahua": My feet are NOT chewtoys!
[edrieanne] - 01:11am Feb 10, 2001 EST (#252 of 652)
smack! SLAP! STOPIT!
BE GOOD!
clasping one hand over mouth and dragging self from thread with other
hand..............
Lights out tonight, trouble in the heartland...
[jollyollie] - 07:07am Feb 10, 2001 EST (#253 of 652)
bump
If you don't like to fish, you might be a commie.
[CooterBrown] - 09:39am Feb 10, 2001 EST (#254 of 652)
We learned on CNN last week that the U.S. Drug Enforcement
Agency has a choir which performs at various functions.
Hmmm...
The Top 14 Songs Performed by the DEA Choir
14> Amazing Grass
13> Don't Sell It On The Mountain
12> I Can Seize Clearly Now
11> Don't Cry For Me, Noriega
10> Who Let The Drug Dogs out?
9> Take Me To The Reefer
8> Help Me, Ganja
7> 99 Vials Of Crack On The Wall
6> You Dropped A Bong On Me
5> I Fought The Law, And The Law Went Medieval On My Ass
4> Tie A Yellow Ribbon (Round the Whole Crime Scene)
3> Hey, 'Lude
2> Shoot Me Up Before You Go-Go
and the Number 1 Song Performed by the DEA Choir...
1> Yakety Yak, Don't Smoke Crack
Men argue, nature acts. ~Voltaire [surferchicklet] -
01:32pm Feb 10, 2001 EST (#255 of 652)
Almost exactly 8 years ago it happened... My best friend called
me to and see her newest *foster dog*... an 11 month old Great
Dane. His owner had the pup and the mother, and due to a
divorce couldn't keep them both, so my friend took him *long
enough to find him a good home.*
This isn't Dom, but it is similar... Harlequin Dane Dom is much
better looking, IMO...
We went up to her house to see him... and since I didn't know
this one after I got out of the car Chicklita climbed out on my
side as well, I got my bag from the car, and turned to see the
*pup* trotting up to Chicklita... and looking down at her...
Eye contact was made, her face was washed with one swipe of
his tongue, and she threw her arms around his neck... Instant
friends.
Over the last 8 years Domino, a harlequin dane, has protected
her from any thing he has seen as a threat... including my
friend's sons, cats and the other dogs... and they have spent a
lot of time just leaning against each other gazing into space...
He's huge and protective but extremely good natured... 2 years
ago he had to have his tail amputated because he wags it too
much... he bashed it into something sharp ... and the bandages,
stitches and so on kept breaking open because he continued to
bash it...
Domino is an old dane now at 9 years old... the giant dogs don't
live as long most of the time...
We are on our way up to see Dommie for what might be the last
time... He fell down the stairs last night and has some blood in
his urine... His kidneys haven't been in the best of shape and
we're afraid they are shutting down now...
He's going to the dog hospital for blood work and other tests,
and if that's the case he'll be put to sleep on Monday.
Chicklita is devastated... And I am not in a real good mood my
self...
Endangered species...........................a [freeindividual]
- 02:47pm Feb 10, 2001 EST (#256 of 652)
surferchicklet
I'm sorry to hear about Dom, for all 3 of your sakes.
Irony: Your mother calling you a son of a bitch
[wardaddy] - 03:37pm Feb 10, 2001 EST (#257 of 652)
Sorry to hear about Dom, chicklet. Great Danes are wonderful
dogs.
Endangered species...........................a [freeindividual]
- 06:10pm Feb 10, 2001 EST (#258 of 652)
Little Tommy's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their
local police station. There they saw pictures tacked to a big
bulletin board. The label clearly read, "The 10 Most Wanted"
One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really
was the photo of a wanted person.
"Yes," said the policeman, "the detectives want him very badly."
So Little Tommy asked, while tugging on the man's belt, "Um,
mister, why didn't you keep them when you took their
pictures?"
Show Bush the door in 2004 [Ferret Mike] - 06:11pm Feb
10, 2001 EST (#259 of 652)
Sory to hear about your canine kid Duh. I appreciate how bad
that make you feel.
Men argue, nature acts. ~Voltaire [surferchicklet] -
06:52pm Feb 10, 2001 EST (#260 of 652)
Uh, Mike, that was me, Chicklet..
And thanks guys... He's not feeling well, you can tell, but he's
still a sweetie... I hope this is something fixable...
The shorter life span is about the only reason I have for telling
Sara, *No... we will not be getting a Dane.* This one is not
*our* dog... and technically the friends aren't even family...
but they are more family than most my *real* family... and
Domino is our dog friend... Sara has had him around as long as
she can remember... We took some pics ... we'll post them later
maybe...
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 03:09am Feb 11, 2001 EST (#261 of 652)
Hey OJ. If your on I have a frames question....
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 04:14am Feb 11, 2001 EST (#262 of 652)
Well. Change your bookmarks. It's official. The site has moved
to www.duhspot.net. WOOWOO.
Picture pages have a new format and have moved to here:
http://www.duhspot.net/PET/pets.html... I haven't figured out
a way to get the pictures to center and have a white
background without making a hundred little html documents....
and of course, this thing is a work in progress... always...
NOTE to 85lb Chihuahua": My feet are NOT chewtoys!
[edrieanne] - 04:18am Feb 11, 2001 EST (#263 of 652)
monrin' Duh!
did you get my baby's pics?
like the new "spot"! Are you up for a "commercial enterprise"?
*g*
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 04:19am Feb 11, 2001 EST (#264 of 652)
I gottem... get them up soon. I just did this thing...
Commercial? You mean making some money... SURE...
NOTE to 85lb Chihuahua": My feet are NOT chewtoys!
[edrieanne] - 04:25am Feb 11, 2001 EST (#265 of 652)
Hmmmmm, what sorta commission do ya want on "estate
jewelry" and fine silver and gold and pearls and diamonds and
stuff! *ggg*
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 04:29am Feb 11, 2001 EST (#266 of 652)
What do I have to do?
NOTE to 85lb Chihuahua": My feet are NOT chewtoys!
[edrieanne] - 05:00am Feb 11, 2001 EST (#267 of 652)
sorry for the delay in answering, was saving the bottom
threads.......
uh, how about a spot on your website, host, dearest? I'll set it up
from here! will post you more later - bar is closing and I'll be
off for about 30 min.
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 05:03am Feb 11, 2001 EST (#268 of 652)
send me details... Don't know about commission. How about low
cost rent?
Oh and to you other people, I forgot who wanted duhspot
emails.... so you have to email me again...
NOTE to 85lb Chihuahua": My feet are NOT chewtoys!
[edrieanne] - 06:45am Feb 11, 2001 EST (#269 of 652)
.
FOX News: "We Fart - You Sniff" [Oregon_Jim] - 01:12pm
Feb 11, 2001 EST (#270 of 652)
Duh
Frames? As in Frames in HTML 4.0 or Framesets as it relates to
Adobe GoLive?
1000 points of light and we got the dim one...
[SherrieG] - 01:19pm Feb 11, 2001 EST (#271 of 652)
Dusty, when you click on some of the pictures (glencar's was
the first one I noticed) the gif opens up over the list. You can
continue by clicking the back button on the toolbar though.
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 08:04pm Feb 11, 2001 EST (#272 of 652)
FOX News: "We Fart - You Sniff" [Oregon_Jim] -
01:12pm Feb 11, 2001 EST (#270 of 271)
Duh
Frames? As in Frames in HTML 4.0 or Framesets as it
relates to Adobe GoLive?
Framesets in Golive. On the new, revamped picture pages, I
have a frameset where the jpgs appear to the right of the
listing. But I would like for them to be centered within the
frame and on a white background. Can't figure out how to do
this without making an HTML doc for each jpg... Also, I can't
center the homepage with out the layers that hold, for example,
the free speech animation not moving relative with the image.
1000 points of light and we got the dim one...
[SherrieG] - 01:19pm Feb 11, 2001 EST (#271 of 271)
Dusty, when you click on some of the pictures
(glencar's was the first one I noticed) the gif opens
up over the list. You can continue by clicking the
back button on the toolbar though.
All fixed.
Edrie. I can offer page design and maintence and email, for a
minimal rental fee.
FOX News: "We Fart - You Sniff" [Oregon_Jim] - 11:15pm
Feb 11, 2001 EST (#273 of 652)
Duh
Do you want the pictures to appear on a "MOUSEOVER" or
"OnClick" trigger?
Also for absolute position I would recommend GoLive's
"Floating Box" feature to hold the JPEG files and whose
"Visibility" can be turned off and triggered "ON" via
"MOUSEOVER" or "OnClick" - your choice.
My sole purpose is to serve as a warning to others
[Duh_] - 02:52am Feb 12, 2001 EST (#274 of 652)
Jim
The pictures should appear in the frame after cliking the link.
If worse comes to worse, I would just be happy in changing the
background of the frames all to white. Tried specifying that in
the code, too, but it doesn't seem to work.
Floating box, eh??
NOTE to 85lb Chihuahua": My feet are NOT chewtoys!
[edrieanne] - 03:07am Feb 12, 2001 EST (#275 of 652)
hmmmmmmmmm, sounds VERRRRRY intriguing!
I'll email you - I'm about a month out from being up and
runnin - still working out how and what I want to do with the
site.
I'm definitely interested in hearing what you have going
on.......and I LIKE the idea of GreyWolfDesigns@duhspot.net -
has a nice ring to it, doncha think?
It'll be about a week before I can really get down to spelling out
what I'm looking for - let me put it together and then we'll toss
it over!
inter arma silent leges [Q] - 06:51am Feb 12, 2001 EST (#276
of 652)
- Unregulated Bump
-
Endangered species...........................a [freeindividual]
- 11:29am Feb 12, 2001 EST (#277 of 652)
IDIOTS IN SERVICE
This week, all our office phones went dead and I had to contact
the telephone repair people. They promised to be out between
8:00 a.m. and 7:00 p.m. When I asked if they could give me a
smaller time window, the pleasant gentleman asked, "Would you
like us to call you before we come?" I replied that I didn't see
how he would be able to do that, since our phones weren't
working. He also re- quested that we report future outages by
email (Does YOUR email work without a telephone line?).
IDIOTS AT WORK:
I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the
clerk noticed I had never signed my name on the back of the
credit card. She informed me that she could not complete the
transaction unless the card was signed. When I asked why, she
explained that it was necessary to compare the signature I had
just signed on the receipt. So I signed the credit card in front of
her.She carefully compared the signature to the one I had just
signed on the receipt. As luck would have it, they matched.
IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD:
I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor
call the local township administrative office to request the
removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason: too
many deer were being hit by cars and he didn't want them to
cross there anymore.
IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE:
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She
asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He
said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg.
IDIOTSIGHTING #1:
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport
employee asked, "Has anyone put any- thing in your baggage
without your knowledge?" To which I replied, "If it was without
my knowledge, how would I know?" He smiled knowingly and
nodded, "That's why we ask."
IDIOT SIGHTING #2:
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the
street. I was crossing with an intellectectually-challenged
coworker of mine when she asked if I knew what the buzzer
was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light
is red.Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people
doing driving?!"
IDIOT SIGHTING #3:
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear co-worker who was
leaving the company due to "downsizing," our manager
commented cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more
often." Not a word was spoken. We all just looked at each other
with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.
IDIOT SIGHTING #4:
I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back
into itself and for the life of her couldn't understand why her
system would not turn on.
IDIOT SIGHTING #5:
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to
pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We
went to the service department and found a mechanic working
feverishly to unlock the driver's side door. As I watched from
the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and
discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the
technician, "It's open!" To which he replied, "I know - I already
got that side.
Endangered species...........................a [freeindividual]
- 06:54pm Feb 13, 2001 EST (#278 of 652)
Does this remind anyone of someone that might occasionally
visit these boards???? *G*
The hamster story:
If you have raised kids, and gone through the pet syndrome
including toilet-flush burials for dead goldfish, the story below
will have you laughing out LOUD!!!
Overview: I had to take my son's hamster to the vet. Here's what
happened:
Just after dinner one night, my son came up to tell me there
was "something wrong" with one of the two hamsters he holds
prisoner in his room.
"He's just lying there looking sick," he told me.
"Oldest trick in the book, son," I informed him. "You go in to see
what's wrong with the sick one and the other one sneaks up
behind you and bonks you on the head. Then they change into
your clothes and escape."
"I'm serious, Dad. Can you help?"
I put my best hamster-healer expression on my face and
followed him into his bedroom. One of the little rodents was
indeed lying on his back, looking distressed. I immediately
knew what to do. Call the professional.
"Honey," I called, "come look at the hamster!"
"Oh, my gosh," my wife diagnosed after a minute. "She's having
babies."
"What?" my son demanded. "But their names are Bert and Ernie,
Mom!"
I was equally outraged. "Hey, how can that be? I thought we
said we didn't want them to reproduce," I accused my wife.
"Well, what did you want me to do, post a sign in their cage?"
she inquired. (I actually think she said this sarcastically!)
"No, but you were supposed to get two boys!" I reminded her, (in
my most loving, calm, sweet voice).
"Yeah, Bert and Ernie!" my son agreed.
"Well, it's just a little hard to tell on some guys," she inf