Okay. The po-po notwithstanding, I had a really nice day yesterday.

I went running. Well. I went walking. I walked to the track, so I could run, but when I got there, I discovered to my chagrin a girls soccer game in progress. I think if I head out an hour or two earlier, I can miss all the youngins. I would run, but the last time I tried to during some soccer game, I tripped over an errant ball. I got there, and sat there in the sun until I realized it probably looks creepy that I'm sitting there watching a dozen teenage girls play soccer that I'm not related to.

I have decided that if I'm going to stress like this, I need to eat better. I am broker than hell so I'm skating on change and tabbing food at the Hole until we build up coin. In addition to the beer, I'm having a salad most days. A friend said in a concerned tone yesterday, "It looks like you've been losing weight." Yes. Yes, I have. Not eating will do that to you. And now that it's warm, I've added exercise to the regimen, so I should be anorexic looking soon. Hopefully it won't get to that point.

I was the only chick playing nine-ball last night, and apparently I am ready to be voted up a class because I shoot beyond the level they put me at when I joined. NOOO. Well. They haven't yet, although there was a couple of threats to do so last night. I think they are going to have a pow-wow and I'll end up bumped to the next level. "You keep beating A players, and we are going to do that."

It's nice to have a place you kinda belong, where they know you, you know them and it's not all about shared pain and crisis. I did have an awfully good time shooting last night. When I use to shoot with D and his friends, it was like spending time with my parents. Now, its a little bit of competition, a little bit of socialization and a lot of fun.

Saw two Mill buddies, Burgess and Wilf, and we sat, talked and laughed. It was really nice to see those guys. Talked about old times, and made tentative plans to get together. Golly, it was REALLY nice to see them. It was like a little reunion, Burgess, Wilf, Shubin and apparently Washburn is in back in town.

Sent in my paperwork to be rid of the big white elephant back home. Don't know how that's going to work out but, god, it's nice to think I won't have to worry about that anymore.

Car is still a big old paperweight, and two of my friends are going to court today. There's a lot of that here, illegalities of some sort or the other. Idle, unemployed hands are the devils playground or something like that. I think its just the area that makes people here ride the redneck rough rails - the hard partying, the darker, grittier side that I'm not use to. I've had a dirtier side, but not this stained. It's made me more accepting of a lot of things and has tested my fortitude and will power in not slipping into a seedier lifestyle. I realize that I am smarter than I ever thought I was, and all in all, have a good deal of wise judgement when it comes to trashing the life I have. Looking around, looking at the "opportunities" for it, there are pitfalls here to just suck you into an even bigger abyss than I am in right now.

Not to say I'm perfect and make the perfect call every time.

But it's nice to know yourself, to know who you are and what you can't or won't be.

It's warm outside, and I've got "Fuck the Po Po" on the loop which kind of makes me feel like a redneck. EGADS. I'm going to be running here in a bit. And then actually eating.

I love the sunshine.

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