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BULLSHIT

17 March 2015, 13:42

I’m calling TOTAL BULLSHIT. SHENANIGANS.

First of all, I was approaching the 100 minute mark when the stupid treadmill just stopped. For no reason. What the BLUE FUCK? I was in the zone. I was a treadmill goddess. I was flying like a gazelle (a fat stinky gazelle). I googled and got nothing on why it did that. I waited a bit and it started back up again, but I lost some of my workout data. Seems to work now but holy hell.

To be honest, I was going to stop because I have developed a big ole blister on my foot in the last hour. Plus, I need to clean a little, so it looks like I did SOMETHING today other than nothing.

Secondly, aside from the ass kicking I have to give myself to START tready time, today I got to the point where I was chasing the high. Legs weren’t hurting (except for the blister), mind was total warm, creamy goo that was shouting “LET’S GOOOOO” and its warm and sunny out my window.

OO. Got a whiff of something stinky. Can’t tell if it’s me or the dog under the desk. Hard to know these days, since they’ve taken to eating cat crap.

But, to the bullshit part. Did more tready than ever before at one time. Even amped up the speed, and said “Damn those torpedos, FULL fucking STEAM AHEAD” or something to that effect. At the time, I was thinking in pictures and pretty well cruising at reptile brain pacing. So, I check down at my heart rate, and I haven’t even broken 120 yet. At the time I started all this crud six weeks ago, I’d be dying at three miles and I’d have a target heart rate of a thousand (okay, 139 or so.) Now I can’t even get the thing up there, without nearly killing myself. I’m not sure whether if you’re not feeling like your going to die or vomit while your exercising, that it’s doing any good. And it’s taking longer to get to the goo brain stage that I like so much. Not sure if its doing any good if it doesn’t hurt.

Just bullshit. Total utter bullshit. Plus, that treadmill stopping thing is real bullshit. I could have done another 20 minutes and made it an even two hours. At least it stopped at 100 minutes and its an even number, divisible by 20 minute intervals. See how I Sheldon Coopered that up? Yeah, I dare you to live in my head for a day.

  • couple minutes later
    Okay, I talked to a gold’s gym customer service monkey and they said it’s a thermal sensor feature that shuts the motor down to prevent it from overheating. So, at about 95-100 minutes it will probably shut down. I’m not sure if that’s bullshit or not, but they said it’s normal. It’s not on fire or smoking so, I guess its all good.