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19 December 2000, 00:00

So. What do you all think of this election? Seems like the plot of some Pauly Shore movie, where Pauly, through a series of comical mishaps, and blunders by the powers-at-be allow the ultimate nightmare to happen…. President Shore. Sends shivers down your back, doesn’t it? Almost as much as the words President Quayle, or President Strom sends the wild heebie jeebies rumbling through my head.

The explosion of interest is clear. It’s the topic of conversation of people who love politics, it’s the topic of arguments among people who hate politics, it’s a comedy for international stage and it’s, sadly and most probably, just business as usual. Oh, don’t give me that look, you KNOW that this is just a snapshot of what has happened, will happen and does happen in the American Behemoth known as the electoral process – we just caught them doing what they have been doing that we’ve been pretty much ignoring. We thought it would be done in a week, then it was two, now I’m just hoping that results of recounts won’t preempt the Superbowl.

And geezus, golly, geeze, all this is happening around two of the ultimate personifications of the Peter Principal I have ever seen. I have been reminded by the Bush candidacy that, indeed, being intelligent doesn’t always have to be a essential characteristic to make one a President. And I guess it doesn’t take intelligence to be a good president, either. If that were the case, the two best presidents we would have had would have been Carter and Nixon. Gore just reminds me that this is the decade of the Nerds. I am really wondering how this lumbering giant of civil service can keep our faith, this political mechanism who send dead people social security checks, build naval bases nowhere near water, pay military contractors on time for contracts they haven’t delivered upon, wanted the Russians to trash a working space station because they think it will encourage them to pay more attention to one that isn’t even put together, puts an agency in charge of promoting the airline industry as well as regulating/watchdogging it, and can’t seem to have 100% congressional attendance for any of the congressional sessions.

This functional incompetence that we apparently approve of and encourage is the root cause of the growing belief of the shadow governments and black op conspiracies, I believe, doncha know. This belief is a testament, nay, a monument to the indomidable spirit of the American People and their optimism. That something somewhere in their government actually works like it is suppose to work.

Brings a tear to your eye, and makes you proud to be an American, don’t it?