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CAPTAIN MARVEL

28 April 2019, 11:44

I just saw Captain Marvel. And I apologize to Brie whatherface. I really didn’t see you doing a good job at that, and well, you did. Groovy. Plus, I have a little big of chauvanism in that I don’t expect much from female superheros. Yeah, it’s an asshole side of me I’ve just discoverd I had.

Back to Captain Marvel. Just saw it. Have to rant about it.

First of all, anybody who knows me KNOWS I hated DC’s Wonder Woman. The movie, for me sucked donkey balls. I love Wonder Woman as a role model and as a badass. When I was a little kid, Linda Carter’s Wonder Woman had an impact on me and stayed with me forever. I was looking forward to what was coming down the pike for her, because I had such high expectations. Marvel had set the superhero movie bar SO high, that I wanted to see something spectacular for my hero. DC movies suck. But, I had real hopes because I am, apparently, the only person on the planet that really liked “Suicide Squad.”

So. Yeah. I was ready for it. I was ready to like it. At least a little. And well. I saw it.

And.

DC failed. DC failed in a giagantic way, in my opinion, to make a strong worthwhile female superhero. They failed to make a worthwhile female role model in Wonder Woman. It was horrible for me. I found the beginning origin story contrived and cartoonish. I found that Wonder Woman was always needing some help, lacking in a clue about things around her, and that her first and formost characteristic was her beauty, which was commented upon over and over again. They even had a pudgy woman comic foil to emphasize that “wow, beauty women rule…” The actress only fit the definition of “actress” in the loosest of terms. I found her acting lacking, to say the very least. Pursing lips and pouting is not a viable character you can maintain for two hours. She was blue steel and duh all throughout the movie. The “empowerment” element, I thought it was the Kitten with a Whip type feminism and, well. Fuck that. The only bright spot in the movie that helped its watchability was Chris “I’m the new Kirk” Whatshisface.

Fuck the way you thought a strong female superhero should be, DC. Jesus Christ.
I just saw Captain Marvel. An understated woman, whose strength is evolving through the movie and revealed. She had beauty but it was never an issue. There is depth and angst and humor, and an unfolding of a strong backstory. Plus, dear fucking god, can you add Sam Jackson and NOT have an absolutely astoundingly good movie? She embodied power and didn’t have to purse her lips and goo all over the place. She was intelligent in an organic way. IT was not beaten over your head she was suppose to be intelligent. Her acting was more than just reading robotically from a script. The movie didn’t have to repeatedly imply, “oh see, books, and shit, she’s smart”. There was a real heart and believability in her character, and I felt – really FELT the empowerment – from the whole movie. Plus, I dug the 90s soundtrack which enhanced the atmosphere and tugged at the nostalgia factor in my being.

Bravo Marvel. I am impressed.

Jesus christ. Just when I thought movies couldn’t inspire, excite or surprise me. I can’t wait to see what the deal is with Endgame. This has set the tone and stage for something truly awesome.